What do I mean by integrity? To me, it means being true to our values and doing the “right” thing under all circumstances. It’s one of the reasons that being a nurse these days, with all the changes in healthcare, is so difficult. We often sacrifice our time and energy for our patients’ well-being.

So what does that mean in terms of integrity in our personal lives? Are we compromising our families and ourselves as individuals because we refuse to compromise the professional part of our lives? What can we do about it?

A few months ago, I graduated from Coach University where I was trained as a personal coach. I felt that the communication skills that I learned through the coaching program would help me in my nursing career as well as in my coaching practice. I learned a lot more than just communication skills. I’ve learned a lot about self-care and prioritizing my life. It has not jeopardized my nursing, but instead has given me back some sense of control.

After all, things have a way of getting done whether we do them or not. I learned that lesson two years ago when I had Lyme disease and was unable to do the extra things I had always done. I could hardly do the bare necessities!

I realized that my patients were still getting seen, and things were being taken care of even without me. Since then I have eliminated many energy drains from my life, and my life is significantly more calm and less stressful. As a result of my experiences over the past five years with Lyme disease and my Coach University training, I have developed a top ten list of things we can all do to make our lives less stressful and more rewarding.

Top Ten Suggestions to Help Nurses Cope

1. Think before answering. When asked to do something (e.g., work an extra shift, or join a new committee), learn to take time by yourself, if only a few minutes, before answering. By taking time away from the person asking, you can more clearly weigh in your mind what’s best for you, first and foremost.
2. Take your vacations. You will be refreshed and better able to do your job. Also, distance provides perspective. What seems like an overwhelming issue can be looked at more objectively when you get away from it.
3. Eliminate small things that drain your energy. For example, as a visiting nurse, I make sure I have a cooler in my car for water and lunch and a cell phone for emergencies so I don’t have to look for a pay phone. I use the library to do my paperwork because I found the office too noisy and I am much more efficient in the quiet atmosphere of the library.
4. Support your coworkers. In the agency I worked at in Pennsylvania, we had a lot of change in the past few years related to changes in healthcare. The one thing we all counted on was that at any time we could go into the office and get as much support as we needed.
5. Wear comfortable clothing and shoes. You work hard; you deserve to at least be comfortable doing it.
6. Treat yourself well. I buy myself flowers every week. I like seeing them every day. Think of something that you can do for yourself every week or every day that will give you the same kind of joy.
7. Avoid people who annoy, harass, or bring you down. Life is too short to waste on irritation. It affects your whole day if you are “dealing” with someone all the time. Toxic people around you hurt you.
8. Check in with yourself often. Think of yourself first. You’ll be a lot more help to everyone if you are not killing yourself doing things that are someone else’s responsibility.
9. Don’t feel guilty saying no. Every moment of life is precious; guilt is an unproductive emotion. In fact, it is an energy-draining and a harmful emotion. Let it go.
10. Remember that being a nurse is one of the noblest professions. Be proud of yourself and all that you do. You know that your patients and families recognize the value of what you do. You should be equally aware of it!